In my last post, I described transformation as a future-based possibility, a new way of being. Transformation isn’t about fixing or improving or making better or more. To fix or improve is past-based. Transformation, rather, is a freedom from the past. It’s honestly looking at where you stand in the present and creating a future based on where you want to go, not a future based on where you’ve been. Giving up the past is the key to future freedom and new possibilities.
So how does that tie into New Year’s Resolutions versus the idea of New Beginnings or New Possibilities? It’s as simple as past-based thinking versus thinking in the present and future. I contend that resolutions are typically past-based and are most often a fix, improvement, or making better. New Possibilities are about the present and future without the guilt associated with trying to fix the past. Did you personally make any New Year’s Resolutions? Were they past-based and designed only to fix or improve? Are you willing to give up the past and try beginning anew with possibilities instead of resolutions that typically are forgotten in a week or month?
Statistics show that somewhere in the vicinity of 97% of New Year’s resolutions won’t be kept. Why? I’ve done some basic research of expert’s opinions on why resolutions don’t work. From this, I’ve formed my own list of 9 reasons resolutions don’t often work.
- Expectation: Most people don’t expect to keep their resolutions.
- Planning: Most people don’t know how to set goals or don’t believe that setting goals matters. Resolutions are also too often made at the last minute without consideration, and are therefore hard to take seriously (see Expectation above).
- Honesty: Resolutions are often not aligned with your values, and they attempt to fix a symptom instead of the underlying issue.
- Negative: Resolutions are most often worded negatively such as lose weight or quit smoking. A more positive alternate resolution would be to adapt a healthy lifestyle. Past-based resolutions are frequently not fun and not rewarding.
- Vague: Goals are unrealistic, not precise and not measurable. There isn’t a specific way to reach the goal.
- Unrealistic: Goals are too large and impossible to reach. The initial failure causes a person to give up too easily. A better way seems to build positively on something that already exists. When starting something new, build up by taking achievable first steps.
- Written: Resolutions that are not written down are easy to forget or ignore. If you can’t commit them to paper, how committed are you fulfilling them yourself?
- Accountability: Without a time deadline, there is no urgency for completion. Also, those with a support system do better than those relying only on themselves to monitor progress. And support is different then nagging.
- On–Going: Take time each month to review and evaluate where you’ve been and where you’re going. Resolutions that are only thought about once a year rather than regularly are more like wishing and hoping instead of action.
Consider the possibility that your own New Year’s resolutions could be past-based thinking and only designed to fix, modify, improve or alter something from your past. Can you shift from making resolutions to setting plans for New Possibilities? It’s not easy to do, but the concept is simple. You must give something up. And that something is a demon or comfort from your past that you don’t want to give up. And it’s not easy to give up. It’s that old pair of gloves that fit perfectly but just don’t get the job done any longer.
Taking an honest assessment of where you are today and where you want to go in the future is the best way to make a life plan.
Vic Johnson says, “If you were going to build a new house and you had this idea for a fabulous master bedroom suite, you wouldn’t rush out and start building the master bedroom. You’d have a complete plan before you started. When you approach resolutions and goals in the same manner, you end up with a much better chance of achieving success.”
What is your life plan?
Next Blog Title: Steve’s Personal New Beginning for 2010
Next Blog Date: Thursday, January 7, 2010