In my previous post I mentioned how Lt. Dan made his peace with God … he gave up the fight. His fight stemmed from the bitterness of being shortchanged of his perceived destiny. He was supposed to die on the battlefield with honor. He wasn’t supposed to be living in a wheelchair. He was fighting for what should have been.
With great difficulty and courage, Lt. Dan gave up his grip on what might have been. When he did that, he was then able to live in peace.
The chorus to Kenny Rogers’ classic song The Gambler starts with the memorable lines:
“You got to know when to hold ’em, know when to fold ’em,
Know when to walk away and know when to run.”
Knowing when to give up the fight seems to be the key. Knowing when to give up the fight is difficult. Knowing when to give up the fight is not something you can be told. Knowing when to give up the fight is something only you can decide for yourself.
Why is making peace so hard?
Why do we hold on when letting go would be much more productive?
When are you willing to walk (and run) away from the past and make your peace?
Here are 4 ideas to help you give up your fight and make your peace:
- Define the fight.
- Depersonalize the fight. Be objective.
- Consider the alternatives.
- Determine if the fight is worth continuing.
When Lt. Dan looked Forrest in the eye and said, “Forrest, I never thanked you for saving my life”, that was the moment that he determined fighting was no longer worth it. Living with peace was possible.
What fight have you been waging for a long time?
What fight have others suggested you consider giving up?
When will you give it up?
Next Blog Title: Jenny’s First Attempt at Giving Up the Fight
Next Blog Date: May 12, 2011